With oncoming years.. age only ascending and the number of white/grey hairs increasing.. we are often faced with circumstances where it becomes absolutely imperative for us to let go and move on ! To let go of the fears, the apprehensions, the dreams, the passion of our life, the love of our life, the children… to let them pursue their own destiny etc etc..

Till date I have been quite unaware of how it feels to lose something precious or someone precious and important. Maybe I have never loved anything that much to have felt its loss.. or have never lost anyone I love deeply! Or maybe I was just ready to let go so it didn’t matter to me! But lately I have this great fear of losing something that has become so precious to me.. And it has a lot to do with my identity, my freedom, my ambitions – and God knows what not !!

I have not yet been able to prioritize as to what is more important – the materialistic things or “value” oriented things like a good partner, parents, a home, friends… !! I have been taught time and again and have been told a zillion times that “materialistic” things eventually fade off… but it’s the family or love that stands by you forever ! But what if things like “freedom”, “career”, “ambition”, “passion” are the most important things to you? Does that make you a hollow person? And, if family is the kind of relation that stands by you no matter what, then why don’t they support you when you want to run after whatever makes you happy at that point?? I am sure, eventually we will realize what we want and don’t want, realize our mistakes and learn from them!

I have seen instances where people in a relationship break up because the guy had to move to another city for that promotion he so wanted and the girl throwing a tantrum about it! Then, I know the mother who doesn’t want her daughter to settle abroad but marry in the same city so that she can feel closer to her! The father, not willing to left behind, doesn’t let the son go into Art studies because it has no future! The husband threatening a divorce if his wife takes up that travelling job that she had been waiting for all her life! How hard is it to let our loved ones follow their desires? How hard is it to step back but be there for when they need us!

Do we ever LET GO?

And what does one do when his/her reigns of life are in someone else’s hand? A while back, a very close friend of mine, in an emotional moment said… “Why does life sometimes take everything or the one thing that could be everything?”  It sounded so true to me at that moment.. but to that I had replied that except for life-death, life also gives us a choice.. and what we choose is entirely in our hands! But I realized that it’s the choices that are tough.

Does one make a choice for oneself or for others? Coz there’s only one option you can choose! If you choose for yourself, you may end up hurting those around you and if you choose for other’s happiness, then maybe, you lose YOURSELF ! What’s more worth?

That’s one contemplation I have not been able to answer yet!

Love.. SK

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